Written by Mr. Fertig
What is your perception of sadness or sorrow?
I think it is natural for many people to view these as signs of weakness or lack of faith. We don’t open up to someone because we are afraid they will judge us or think less of us. We don’t see everyone else’s struggles so we assume (incorrectly) that they don’t have struggles. Sometimes we think we are being a burden to others by opening up about different hurts we have. On the other hand, we see things from the outside and often think/say something cliché or trite because we don’t understand that pain the other person is experiencing. It is my guess that most of us want to fix the situation because we feel uncomfortable sharing in the hurt of the other person because we don’t have a solution to “fix” the issue. We are all trying to keep up the façade we want everyone else to see to keep from being vulnerable. This leads to a cycle of everyone faking it for everyone else.
But let’s get real now…
Sadness, sorrow, and pain are all very real! It is ok to feel these. It is not necessarily a reflection of your faith, your character, and certainly not your identity in Christ. It is also ok to reach out to your fight club or be reached out to. Sometimes all that a person needs is an ear to listen, or someone to stand by them through the pain without saying a word. It is important to know that God is with you in the hard times.
The first place I go is to the One who created me and my heart, soul, and mind. My favorite passages of scripture to go to when I am struggling with these things are some of the Psalms. Here, King David is pouring out his heart (and I’m pretty sure he may have been a lot more “manly” than me, so if he can pour out his heart to God I can get over my own pride too).
Psalm 34:18a (TPT) – “The Lord is close to all whose hearts are crushed by pain…”
Psalm 42 (TPT) – “I long to drink of you, O God, drinking deeply from the streams of pleasure flowing from your presence. My longings overwhelm me for more of you! My soul thirsts, pants, and longs for the living God. I want to come and see the face of God. Day and night my tears keep falling and my heart keeps crying for your help while my enemies mock me over and over, saying, ‘Where is this God of yours? Why doesn’t he help you?’ So I speak over my heartbroken soul, ‘Take courage. Remember when you used to be right our front leading the procession of praise when the great crowd of worshipers gathered to go into the presence of the Lord? You shouted with joy as the sound of passionate celebration filled the air and the joyous multitude of lovers honored the festival of the Lord!’ So then, my soul, why would you be depressed? Why would you sink into despair? Just keep hoping and waiting on God, your Savior. For no matter what, I will still sing with praise, for living before his face is my saving grace! Here I am depressed and downcast. Yet I will still remember you as I ponder the place where your glory streams down from the mighty mountaintops, lofty and majestic – the mountains of your awesome presence. My deep need calls out to the deep kindness of your love. Your waterfall of weeping sent waves of sorrow over my soul, carrying me away, cascading over me like a thundering cataract. Yet all day long God’s promises of love pour over me. Through the night I sing his sons, for my payer to God has become my life. I will say to God, ‘You are my mountain of strength; how could you forget me? Why must I suffer this vile oppression of my enemies – these heartless tormentors who are out to kill me?’ Their wounding words pierce my heart over and over while they say, ‘Where is this God of yours?’ So I say to my soul, ‘Don’t be discouraged. Don’t be disturbed. For I know my God will break through for me.’ Then I’ll have plenty of reasons to praise him all over again. Yes, living before his face is my saving grace.”
Psalm 119:25-28 (TPT) – “Lord, I’m fading away. I’m discouraged and lying in the dust; revive me by your work just like you promised you would. I’ve poured out my life before you, and you’ve always been there for me. So now I ask: teach me more of your holy decrees. Open up my understanding to the ways of your wisdom and I will meditate deeply on your splendor and your wonders. My life’s strength melts away with grief and sadness; come strengthen me and encourage me with your words.”
Share your heart with God even when it doesn’t seem like something you want to tell Him. He is big enough, strong enough, and loving enough to bear your sadness, hurts, discouragements, and pain! Be real with God!
1 Peter 5:7 – “Cast all your cares on Him because He cares for you.”